Ultrasound Tomorrow

Since Tyler started active duty service with the Navy, we have enjoyed 100% health care coverage for in-house doctors. Overall we have been very happy. Worst thing so far: forced to reschedule an appointment because I checked in 2 minutes late. Ugh! Best thing so far: our pediatrician in South Carolina - he listened, explained, was organized and clear, had all the time in the world, emailed back promptly, cute with the boys … he was good.  But as with any set of doctors, they make their own rules about certain things, and my current doc said I couldn't get my big ultrasound until I was AT LEAST 20 weeks - and even then he thought he was doing me a favor!

So I'm exactly 20 weeks tomorrow, December 20th, and we're getting our ultrasound.  I could have driven 14 miles down the road and paid $65 for a 3D ultrasound and gender determination 4 weeks ago, but we saved our pennies (6,500 of them) and waited. The stress is mounting - my eczema proves it.

If this baby is a girl, my heart would race, I'd yelp, and I would be so excited to tell everyone and then I would be nervous. It's new territory for us, and we'd have to get all new clothes and blankets and some new toys (eventually).  I'd have a lot to do and only 20 weeks to do it!  But it would be exciting.

I am completely happy at the prospect of having all boys except for one little thing: I want to be part of a daughter of mine having a baby.  That's the only thing that I really get worked up about.  Hair ribbons? Nah. Tights? On a baby? Hallelujah.  Nail painting? They have professionals for that. Crafting? Never liked it much anyways.  I'm telling you, the rest doesn't bother me. Just that one thing.  But it's a million miles away.  And I know, having one daughter doesn't guarantee she'll have children.  But there's the hope of that moment.

On the flip side, of course I would do all those girly things with her and manage the tights and periods somehow. It would be fun! If this baby's a girl she would be the first female grandchild for Tyler's parents and first girl for one set of Tyler's greats.  Girls aren't anything new on my side of the family though. :)

If this baby's a boy, I will breathe a deep breath and rest easy.  I have the stuff, I know the routine.  We'll have this adorable family of three boys.  I'd be in league with some of the best moms I know.  I would be excited to tell everyone and feel like someone upstairs really trusts us to raise that much energy. Someday the three of them will go golfing with their dad all Saturday morning and I will sleep sleep sleep.

The thought of having another boy isn't as thrilling or scary as having a girl, but just as sweet.

And what's my hunch? I think more about having a girl than a boy, but just because it's different.  Do I really think I know or have a hunch?  No.  None.  Notta. I've got nothing for you. Or me.  Just dying to see that ultrasound!

I did dream two nights ago that my ultrasound tech only looked at the baby for about 3 seconds, said, "Your baby is healthy. Your ultrasound is over. Please exit through that door." I rebutted with needs of measurements, disability testing, and gender discovery!  I've been so worried about disabilities with this baby and I NEED TO KNOW.  Seriously, I'll show you my stress-induced eczema.  She got sharp and before long it was a crazy yelling match.  It was a complete nightmare!  Please let that not happen.  And if my baby's shy, there's no going back without a fee.  So come on baby, cooperate!